No news is good news (or, He's not a driver, he's loco!)

From the "slow news day" files of The Hindu:

Engine driver is
now 'loco pilot'

Staff reporter

Kollam: The driver of a passenger or goods train is no more an engine driver. He will now be known as 'loco pilot.'

A notification to this effect has appeared in Indian Railways' (open lines) General Amendment Rules 2006.

According to the notification, the term 'driver' is renamed as 'loco pilot' and 'first fireman' or 'assistant driver' as 'assistant loco pilot.' Following the notification, all duty communications to engine drivers are now addressed to loco pilots...

It continues like this. For 200 hundred freaking words. What a waste of space! Need I mention that this is on page 7 of their national edition?

While I do appreciate their ardor for linguistic reform...come on, people. Ass.

Tags: the hindu, newspaper, india, loco pilot, report, not news