Ugly outfit, uglier reaction

They're not the fashion police, but Bollywood star Mallika Sherawat's New Year's ensemble was spicy enough to attract an official investigation after a social worker complained she and her act were obscene.

At left, you'll notice Sherawat in what appears to be stripper wear: glittery g-string, barely there bikini top, and incomprehensible chaps. But really, what makes it all the more hideous is that it's stripper wear attached to a flesh-colored bodysuit; skintight, but certainly not endangering the audience with the threat of her lady bits.

I could and will quibble with the outfit. However, the reaction it's attracted is more odious than any bedazzled wonder she could have donned. SHE IS ABSOLUTELY, FULLY CLOTHED. And even if she wasn't, how is this any more obscene than the photos that are routinely printed in the city tabloids? Than the stars that romp through waterfalls for passionate kisses (or simulated sex) on the big screen? Correct me if I'm wrong, but she was performing at a private party. If you don't like it, leave your swank, five-star Mumbai Marriott and get drunk on expensive booze elsewhere.

I know there are a lot of people who will take this up and start crying about saving the children, etc., but much as I malign her, Mallika did kinda think about the kids here. There's nary a possibility for an upskirt shot here because she's encased in a beige sausage casing, festooned with sparkles. It's not an outfit I'd choose, but you could do worse (Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, I hope your vaginas are listening).

I do sort of wish she'd gone whole hog, just performed in a bikini, but I just don't know if the nation could handle it.